I didn’t even notice, but it’s been ten days since my last update here. In that time I’ve come to some decisions regarding my studies – mainly that it’s high time that I take them seriously and start thinking about more than the next homework, the next paper.

I want to start my thesis and then do my exams in a year (which means that I’ll finish in two years), and I’ve suddenly realized that that’s not such a long time. I have finally found a suitable subject for my thesis (Maori landrights), and that gave me the kick in the ass I needed. There’s so much I have to do and read in order to be able to finish my studies – and I won’t be able to cram that all into the months that are officially allotted for writing the thesis and studying for the exams. It’s time to be realistic and get to work.

But these last couple of days, although I was quite prolific working on my fieldwork paper (finally – it’s only taken me half a year…) and doing homework, have been a bit rough for me. I’ve been pretty stable emotionally in the past weeks, but that balance was shaken and I’ve been going through ups and downs. I know it will pass, it always does, but at the moment I feel quite vulnerable and don’t quite know where (who) to turn to, what to do, to overcome it.

But as always, I’m an optimist at heart and always hoping that tomorrow will be better. There’s so much to be done, after all, no time to hang around and feel sorry for myself.