I always knew my mind worked differently, especially in social situations. It’s not that I don’t like them, I do, but even having fun I’d always be the one looking for an excuse to leave early. So when I took a Myers-Briggs personality test at uni and scored quite highly on the introversion scale, it felt like a revelation. And so did reading this book.

When I tell people that I’m an introvert, they tend to laugh, because I come across as highly social and friendly, contrary to most people’s perception of introverts as shy wallflowers. But after the Myers-Briggs test, I was able to explain that the difference isn’t how we behave but how we recharge our batteries, by being among people or by withdrawing to be by ourselves.

This is the basis for Cain’s book. She describes not only a lot of the research that’s been done on how personality traits are formed and how to recognize them in children and adults, she also explains the many ways in which our modern (Western) world is geared towards extroverts. Not just in business settings, but also in our schools, team work and outspoken leadership are often seen as the be-all and end-all, forcing many introverts to either remain on the outskirts or exhaust themselves trying to fit in.

Cain covers everything from childhood, workplace to personal relationships, and she does so using easily accessible language and illuminating examples, including her own, making the book very relatable even when covering scientific theories. I had several “aha!” moments while reading, not just about myself but also about how extroverts work, giving me useful tips for future use.

This book is definitely recommended reading for, well, anyone – introverts as well as the people who love them. And considering a third to half of the population is on the introvert end of the personality spectrum, that’s pretty much everyone. 🙂